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Hey y'all! (By which I basically mean Heather, as you are probably the only one reading. XP )

Finally am getting over my respiratory infection...first day back at practice. It's been so frustrating not being able to keep up all the good progress I was making - but I guess it was just as important to rest and give my body time to heal itself. Still, I was definitely feeling the difference at practice today...so much rink rust!! Legs so achy and uncooperative. Endurance even less than I remember. Lame.

Still, I didn't give up, and pushed through...not my best performance, but it's always a little rough after you've been away for a while.

Restarting the pushups and crunches challenge on Monday from scratch...still squatting while I brush my teeth...going to make an effort to find more opportunities to skate during the week, as well.

Practice tonight was good - like I said, was disappointed in my performance, at first, but stuck with it, and even got to work on can-openers. Not great at them yet, but getting there...tough not to follow through with the elbow - have to remember to keep my hand low and in front of me.

Then, got banished to the corner. :.( Really wanted to try the blocking / wall drills they were working on...worse, we had nobody working with us, for like, fifteen, twenty minutes, so it was kinda demoralizing. But then Salty showed up (Salty to the rescueeee!) and really kicked our asses...we did a lot of low-and-slow eggshells...real legburners. And we did some pace line...it felt good, really good, to be pushed to my limit. It's the only way I'm going to get better. (I think I scared her when I almost passed out though. LOL. Note to self: Hydrate.) Even got to work on starts a little bit. (Guess what? Mine are shitty. Shocker.)

All told, good practice. I reeeeeeally need to get my endurance up, though, because that's the only thing holding me back. Even Salty was saying that we look good on our skates, steady, not wobbling, skills are solid - it's just the endurance, speed, and general conditioning that's holding us back.

So. Monday - resume challenge. Seek additional cardio opportunities. And, as always: NEVER GIVE UP!

Sick XP

Terrible derby day.

Sick. Really sick - too sick for practice, too sick for pushups / crunches challenge. :,(

Hoping I feel better tomorrow...can at least do my challenge stuff.

Hate - HATE. Being sick.


- Squatted while brushing teeth
- Week 1, Day 2 of Pushups and situps challenge!

Doing them as we speak, actually, and typing between rests.

I'm still not very happy with my form - I'd like my arms to be bending more, basically, however, I do notice that the good form push ups seem SLIGHTLY easier to do today?... So I think I'm going to keep pushing myself to do them this way, and then just supplement them at the end with some knee-push-ups and chair planks.

Set 1: 3
Set 2: 4
Set 3: 2
Set 4: 3
Max Set: 5
Total: 17

Also, 10 knee-push-ups.

In general, I'm finding the crunches much easier, and I'm suspicious that this means I'm doing them wrong, or softpedaling them somehow...I started on the intermediate level, and I'm finding it pretty easy. Although to be fair, I do feel it when I stretch my abdomen the next day?...so I guess it's okay. My shoulders are coming off the ground slightly, but my lower back is rounding out and staying pressed to the floor, which is how it's supposed to be...? Anyways. Will just keep sticking with it, and see what happens...maybe as the program progresses I'll find I'm getting a slightly deeper crunch.

Set 1: 9
Set 2: 12
Set 3: 9
Set 4: 9
Set 5: 9 whoops. LOL. I'm pretty sure I did an extra set by accident. Whatevs.
Max Set: 22


I'm also realizing that this is DEFINITELY NOT Cardio...I'm not sweating at all doing this. Yes, it's difficult, and I feel my muscles really working, but I find that I'm not really breaking a sweat - I guess that comes later, when the sets are larger...I need to find fun ways to incorporate cardio on the days I'm not doing calisthenics...I wish I could just skate, skate, skate my ass off. I really want to own my own roller rink, y'all. >.< Let's get on that, huh?

30 Second Chair Plank
20 second rest
30 Second Chair Plank

Yeeeeeah....chair planks kinda hurt my back today. >.< Really need to build up my back...Mikey recommended I do supermans (lie on your stomach, lift up your hands like you're flying around like Superman) and back presses to build it up...I think maybe that's a good idea, but I'm gonna do those on days I'm not doing the challenge...so:

Monday - Challenge Day
Tuesday - Cardio (Nite Train workout, if avail?)
Wednesday - Challenge Day
Thursday - Need a cardio activity, and build back strength.
Friday - Challenge Day, Practice Day
Saturday - Build back strength.
Sunday - Practice Day

Another bummer is that Stations of the Cross is starting up, which is going to seriously cramp my derby practice style on Friday nights. XP Guess I'll just have to work extra hard, maybe hit up some open skates. If anyone ever knows of one and is in the mood to go, holla atcha girl!

Ta for now!



- Squatted while I brushed my teeth
- Had a lovely dinner with my derby wifey, DOMino, WHO PASSED HER ENDURANCE ASSESSIES, BEE TEE DUBS.
- Started the 100 Push Ups and 200 Sit ups challenge tonight!

Okay, here's the deal with that: I bought these "Perfect Push Up" handle bar things...figuring that'd be easier on my wrist than laying my hand flat on the floor.

WRONG. $20 = Bye bye. Sucks. IDK, maybe I'll end up using them down the line when I'm stronger? Anyway...

I did all the sets that I was supposed to for today, but when I try to do "good form" push-ups, I can only bend my elbows like, an inch. So now I'm wondering if I'm really getting the full benefit of it, or if I should try doing one of the modified versions (on the knees, or on a chair) and getting a fuller, deeper press?

I think I'm gonna continue trying to do the "big girl" "grown up" push ups, and supplement at the end of my sets with a chair plank, and increase the length of the plank over time...today I did a 30-second chair plank.

If I find I'm still struggling with good form push ups by week 2, I might modify them slightly - maybe use a stair, or a couple stacks of books under my hands, so it's SLIGHTLY easier, but I can still use proper form (without resorting to "girl" push-ups.)

I also did remarkably well on my crunches...(The site doesn't actually recommend doing full, old-fashioned sit ups, they just call it "200 sit ups." It's really more like 200 CRUNCHES.) I put myself on the medium track instead of the total n00b track like I am for push-ups, and did pretty well, akshully.

So, here's the numbers:

Set 1 - 2
Set 2 - 3
Set 3 - 2
Set 4 - 2
Max Set - 4

Wasn't happy with quality of my push ups, so I also did 10 Knee push-ups

Total Push-ups Today: 23


Set 1 - 9
Set 2 - 9
Set 3 - Was supposed to do 6, I did 8. :D
Set 4 - 6
Max Set - 20

Total Sit-Ups Today: 52 (Just like my skate number! OooOOoOOoOoooooo....)

30 Second Chair Plank


Hi everyone!

So first things first:

My lovely derby wife DOMino passed her 25/5 assessments tonight!!!! WOOOOOOT!

Now, for the slightly sad news: Yours truly did not. :(

Speed and endurance are still my Achilles heel! At first I was really down on myself...especially when I got sent to the corner to work skills afterwards. >.<

But, I got to do some really good skill drills down there, still managed to keep my heart rate up with laps and push-ups, and worked on some REALLY great hitting drills. I am gonna seriously pwn all who oppose me...I just need to speed the frakk up!!!

So, all told, it was a somewhat disappointing, somewhat wonderful, somewhat bittersweet practice tonight...

My time, by the way, was 6:39, for the 25 laps...the fastest I'd ever done prior to that was 17 laps in 5 minutes, so I definitely bested my previous personal best...can't ask for any more than improvement, right? I'd like to start going to speed skate, but it's $40 per month, and i just can't swing that right now.

Still, good things are on the horizon...I think I'm well poised to pass my other skill assessments, plus I'm starting the 100 push ups and 200 sit ups challenge, with Voldieloxx, Discordelia, and two "real life" friends, Harley and Christine! Tomorrow's the first day of that...

Here's the link to the site:


And here's the link to the Library Derby Dolls, Voldie and Discordelia:


Another important note: PLEASE PUSH ME! Anyone reading this, text me any time you're workin' out...call me and say "Hey, how ya doin, wanna go for a jog?" I'm hyper-determined to break through this wall, and to pass this damn thing ASAP.

Lotsa love,


Soooo excited about practice tonight!!! I got to scrimmage!!! XDDDD

I didn't get called off the line, not even once, was able to participate in every drill, AND scrimmage at the end, and I didn't even totally suck! Even managed to push one of the more experienced skaters out of bounds, VERY exciting.

Plus, doing the 100 Push Ups and 200 sit-ups challenge with Harly, Voldieloxx, DisCordelia, and Christine Gritmon! Awesomesauce.

Good things happening in the derby world, folks. Keep sending good vibes!


2/27 - Practice Day, stomach bug, left work early, too nauseous to skate. :( Five hour powernap ensued, and feeling a little better...reeeeally hoping this is gone by tomorrow. Feeling really bummed about missing practice today. :(


Tuesday 2/22 - Thursday 2/24:

Was down in Delaware, visiting my Dad, who I hadn't seen since before Christmas - so that was good. Unfortunately not a lot of opportunity for working out, but I did still manage to squat while I brushed my teeth. Also, had the dog with me, so Bodhi and I went on some nice, extra-long, walks, and went more frequently, also.

Friday, 2/25/11: PRACTICE DAY.



Okay, actual, crappy, negative sentiments are small, ENFORCED POSITIVITY BE POSITIVE DAMNIT is in bold caps:

I wasn't feelin' it today, because it was rainy and dark and gross out...but I AM PROUD OF MYSELF BECAUSE I PUT ON MY SKATE MIX, AND GOT THE ENERGY TO SUIT UP AND GET IN THE CAR AND HEAD DOWN THERE FOR A WORK OUT. I got there and strapped up, hit the rink to warm up...we started by doing calisthenics like usual, which I could barely freakin' do, if at all. But I'M PROUD OF MYSELF BECAUSE AT LEAST I TRIED ALL OF THEM, AND DIDN'T GIVE UP. Then we started working on pack drills - and of course, I'm the slowest one in the pack. BUT ALL MY DERBY SISTERS HELPED ME, AND ENCOURAGED ME, AND AGAIN, I DIDN'T GIVE UP. And of course, I got pulled from the pack to go skate in the corner. ...I GOT NOTHIN'.

In the corner, we worked on some basic skills like T-stops, but we also worked on things I suck at, like Toe Run Starts, Duck Runs, Reversals. I was so incredibly frustrated BUT AT LEAST I WAS BEING CHALLENGED. The only HIGHLIGHT OF CORNER TIME WAS THAT I FINALLY MANAGED TO NAIL MY OPPOSITE-DIRECTION CROSSOVERS!

So...trying really really hard to feel good about how practice went, but I feel like unless I start pushing myself to skate as long, as hard, and as fast as I can, my speed and endurance are just never going to get better sitting in the corner. Plus, it was so irritating to see skaters who are total Fresh Meat doing reversals and toe runs like it's nothing, and I'm falling all over the place. As far as the toe runs go: look - I am almost 300 pounds of skater, okay? You can not launch 300 pounds of skater off a one-inch square toe-stop...especially a hard plastic one that just slips right off that dusty sport court. As far as the reversals go, I have no freakin' excuse, and no freakin' clue why this is so impossible for me to figure out. >.<

AGH. I am so freaking down on myself and really hating myself for falling short.



Yeah. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it. :P I might even believe it eventually.

I guess the other thing to remember is that I want to be doing roller derby for the rest of my life, right? Soooo...what hurry am I in? It's supposed to be fun, right? So, ANY TIME I GET THE OPPORTUNITY TO PUT MY GEAR ON, GO TO THE RINK, GET SWEATY, LEARN SOMETHING NEW, AND HAVE FUN SKATING, IS A VERY SUCCESSFUL PRACTICE, BECAUSE I LEAVE THE PRACTICE A BETTER SKATER THAN I ARRIVED, AND BECAUSE I HAD FUN.

Again. Repeat, repeat, repeat, until this becomes my primary belief structure. o.0

As an interesting exercise, here's what the above blog entry would have read like with only the positive statements:

"I am proud of myself, because I put on my skate mix, and got the energy to suit up and get in the car and head down there for a work out. I'm proud of myself because at least I tried all the calisthenics, and didn't give up. All my derby sisters helped me, and encouraged me, and again, I didn't give up. We worked on Toe Run Starts, Duck Runs, and Reverals. I was being challenged. Highlight of corner time was that I finally managed to nail my opposite-direction crossovers! Tonight is the night I did my first opposite direction crossovers, so I learned something new today, and I'm a better skater now than I was before I went to practice. I'm awesomer than all the people who thought "Hey, that'd be cool to do roller derby" but never got the nads up to try it. And I'm awesomer than all the people who tried it and said, "Nah, thi sis kinda hard, I quit." And I'm awesomer than the negative people who aren't even trying to be positive, who just want to bitch and bring people down and let their frustration take the fun out of it. Any time I get the opportunity to put my gear on, go to the rink, get sweaty, learn something new, and have fun skating, is a very successful practice, because I leave the practice a better skater than I arrived, and because I had fun."

Hmm. o.0 Interesting...


- Squatted while brushing teeth.
- Rescheduled a Monday student to be able to make a JDB Sponsorship Event. (After all, it's not all about being a better skater, it's also about being a better teammate.)

Wish I could've done more today, but it was a monster, beginning to end. XP Will try to get some extra work in tomorrow, maybe some crunches or planks or somethin'.

Signing off.


- Squatted while brushing my teeth...have decided to do this from now on.
- Ate salad I packed from home for lunch instead of greasy take out.

Practice Day.


Not gonna lie, y'all. Majorly disappointing practice today. I was so excited to be included more in the JDB practices, and I was really busting my hump - it was difficult for me, absolutely, but difficult is what I need to improve. I stuck with the first pace line for the whole first skill exercise (backwards weaving through the line) but then they started pulling people to go be Freshies and skate in the corner.

And I really. REALLY. Didn't want to do that. So I worked really hard and pushed it out - but even though I was keeping up with the line (and I'm not gonna lie, I was sweating and huffing and puffing and grunting, but I was doin' it) guess who got sent to the corner?

Yeah. Me.

Sooooo I got some kickass T-stops in today.


I know. I know. Skills are important. Everyone should be doing skills. Great.

I'm just not going to get any Stronger, any Faster, or build any more Endurance, skating no miles an hour in the corner. We're trying to practice leaning, working our way up to hits (aghhhh I was HITTING LAST SEASON) and I'm just knocking these ladies over. I'm not knocking them - because their relationship to me is exactly my relationship to the rostered girls. I guess that's the reason they pulled me out, because I'm cramping their style and slowing them down...but the problem is, nobody's getting pushed to their potential that way. It's rough for an intermediate skater, man. It's like option, "I'm basically ready to bout" or "I just let go of the wall."

Most of all, I just hate, hate, hated myself. And I hated even more watching my derby wife skate away without me to keep working on the line. I love that she's having success with it, all I ever want is for my friends and loved ones to succeed. But lately with Dames being so busy with the store, I feel like no one can succeed without leaving me in the dust. :,( I just wanna succeed together.

Anyway. Worked on T-stops, leaning, a little bit on hip checks. Did some crossover steps. But that was the end of the sweat for practice.

So when I got home, I changed shoes, hitched up Bodhi, and took him for a jog. Went down to the end of the park and back, then walked the opposite direction down the hill to the street, then ran back up the hill and home (with periodic breaks for peepee. Him, not me.)

Because fuck it.

Because fuck it hard, right in the ear.

Because I don't know what else to do with this pain but throw myself at it again and again and again. And if I'm going to fail spectacularly at this, I'm going to be sweating, screaming, swinging, and fighting.



Rough night. Rough night for a derbygirl. Sometimes I feel like a poser calling myself that, even though I've been doing this for over a year now. Although I guess that's dumb. People who play softball don't wait until they pass some stupid test to call themselves a softball player. I don't know. I'm just really fucking tired of being Evan, and I'm pretty damn ready to be Bruise Wayne, for GOOD.